


Stop Loving Fire

by fear_of_being_bitten



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Abduction, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Dark, Bitter Kylo, Dominant Kylo Ren, Dream Sex, Dreams, Dreamsharing, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Forced Bonding, Inception Vibes, Infection of dreams, Invasion of Privacy, Isolation, Kidnapping, Mustafar (Star Wars), On Hiatus, Possessive Behavior, Post-Canon, Rape/Non-con Elements, Resistant Rey, Sith Lore, Sith stuff, Vader Castle, desert island vibes, tags will update
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-12-06
Packaged: 2020-12-12 19:37:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20991065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fear_of_being_bitten/pseuds/fear_of_being_bitten
Summary: ON HIATUS- SUBSCRIBE FOR UPDATE ALERTS************************************READ THE TAGS- DARK!The Scavenger had shut him out of their bond since Crait, but Kylo still felt her. Her heartbeat haunted him like a ghost.He finally had her in his grasp on Pasana. Her weight in his arms was more satisfying than claiming the throne. There’s no escape where they’re going. This time she won't tell him no.This time, she'll take his hand.____________Ben Solo will be redeemed in canon.  He will choose the light.This is a dark fantasy that asks “but what if he didn’t?”





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is an AU based on the teaser and what *could've* happened after Crait if Kylo Ren turned Rey to his side instead of returning the light. If he put his possession of her above all else.
> 
> Tags will update.

______

He was accustomed to the feel of her heartbeat now. Haunting him like a ghost.

Kylo had not seen her since Crait. She had managed to close their bond somehow, slamming it shut as decisively as the Falcon door. It was a surprising trick for someone of such limited training. He wondered if she even knew how she did it. 

The Scavenger was unlike any other lightsider he had known. A better comparison was a sandstorm– erratic and instinctive power that was barely under control. She would’ve made a devastating Sith.

He could not see her, but he _ felt _her. She could not deny him that. Her heart beating in his empty chest was a mockery and a taunt. 

He tried to forget her. He couldn’t forget.

It would drive him mad. 

+++

In the months after the Rebellion’s defeat, Kylo Ren had taken his rightful place as Supreme Leader. The galaxy bowed down to him in fear, which was far easier for him to maintain than respect. 

He learned that order was an illusion. Power shifted inevitably to the strongest hands, so he made his an iron fist. Supreme Leader Kylo Ren ruled with a discipline that befit an Emperor, leaving behind the tempestuous fits of his youth.

He knew who he was now.

His past was dead, yet he couldn’t seem to escape it. Luke was gone, his father too, and now his mother had joined them after a short illness. He was all alone on a throne of silence, but it was not sweet victory. It tasted like nothing, dry on the tongue. 

The Rebellion was dying, too. It was only a matter of time until they were wiped out completely– like a spot of rust on steel. Yet the scavenger girl stubbornly evaded him. She didn’t reach for him, not anymore, but her pulse called from across the stars like a siren song he couldn’t get out of his head. 

He had to stop it, or better yet,_ claim it. _ Feel that steady throb for himself. Wrap fingers tight around her throat as the pulse quickened and her lifeblood roared in his own ears. Maybe then he’d find peace.

Scouts, spies, and the best the hunters in the galaxy took the bounty to bring her back to him in chains. If not to sit by his side, then to kneel down before him. 

Yet in the end, none of them were necessary. 

Her heart gave her away, as it always did. 

+++

The remnants of the Rebellion were found on Pasana, evidently hunting for the same Sith artifact that Hux required for his new pet superweapon. Not that Kylo Ren cared any for that. 

If she wanted the artifact, then he would find it first. Find it, find her. Simple.

He could feel her telltale pulse in his veins. She was down on the surface and separating from the fight in a valiant attempt to save her friends. He sent the rest of his fighters to chase the Rebels and turned his sights to her. 

How quaint that the little sand rat placed sentiment over wisdom, exposing herself this way. His gloves gripped the TIE controls so firmly that the leather creaked. Worse for her to have his undivided attention. His dead master was correct after all– her naivete would be her undoing.

That thought triggered the memory of the red room. Standing back to back, false tears and even falser hopes. Kylo seethed and the dark anger fueled his power.

It was beneath him to care for her– she was a fool, blind even to reject what he had to offer her, when she had nothing, _was nothing– _but Kylo was never good at letting go of slights and was even worse at losing. 

She would not get away this time.

All his senses trained to her force signature as he dropped from the clouds to barely skirt the surface. A glimmer of bright white flashed on the horizon It led him closer, like a beacon.

He would scare her and make her roll out of the way in a game of dominance. She would relent and admit he had the upper hand. She must.

Following the steady heartbeat, he saw a blur of white on the gold sand in the distance. She was holding the saber made from the shards of kyber they had split together.

He clenched his jaw and aimed for the light.

Her heart was beating as fast as his, a deafening drumbeat. He could feel her power and the emotions she couldn’t possibly conceal from him at this close proximity– fear, anger, regret. 

He knew she wouldn’t let herself be mowed down, the risk was to her pride. She would concede to him. Let her duck and roll away, like the coward who left him bleeding and unconscious amongst the bodies of her enemies in the throne room. Let her admit she was weaker than him and finally feel the screaming pain of loss that he knew so well.

_ Let her hurt like he had hurt. _

Kylo closed in without pity.

But instead of falling down, she leapt into the air. 

She flew from his grasp in an intolerable show of grace and strength, escaping him yet again. Kylo roared in frustration as her saber arced through the air and sliced through the right wing on the downstroke.

With a hiss and a cloud of sparks, the cabin alarms sounded around him. The hydraulics were useless. He wavered in the air, then listed left as the wing dug into the dunes. He hit sand at incredible speed and spun out of control.

His arms flew up to use the force to shield his face from impact and debris. His dead ship slid to a stop as he was wrenched in his seat.

Before the dust had even settled, Kylo unhooked his harness and ignited his saber to cut himself from the wreckage. He landed on the dunes with a soft thud and threw his billowing cape over a shoulder. Despite his fury, he couldn’t contain his eagerness to see her. His eyes traced over her hungrily and he strode forward with his weapon drawn. 

She was more woman than girl now. The pure energy of youth had been molded into elegance, her raw power honed with a fine edge of control. He stalked across the distance and could see the flashes of trepidation and resolve on her features.

Under that, he could sense something pushed down and covered in a futile attempt to keep it from him. She lit her saber and he lit his, the angry red tip of his blade dragging on the cracked earth as clouds formed above them.

Ah, yes. This close, she couldn’t hide it from him. After all these long months, unbelievably, it was still there. _ Hope. _ She still had a glimmer of hope for him. 

Good. He would use that against her.

He raised his weapon. She swirled hers in a show of bravery, although he didn’t know for who’s benefit– his or her own. 

Before she could attack, before they had even exchanged words, he ducked to the left to throw her off guard. While her mental shields were down to focus on her parry, he waved his hand quickly to knock her into a force sleep.

She dropped helplessly to the ground.

He shut off her saber and hooked it onto his belt next to his. Kylo scooped her into his arms, just as he had done in a forest long ago, and felt her heart thudding in solid tempo along with his. His prize was in his arms, finally. 

The plan was in motion. He called to his Knights with his location. The sabers would be stored with Ethseba Ren for safekeeping. They wouldn’t need them where they were going.

Kylo took a moment to luxuriate in victory. The weight of her in his arms was more satisfying than claiming the throne. She was finally at his mercy.

This time she could not say no.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter count is a little fluid.
> 
> To get a Sith translation, use this translator: https://funtranslations.com/sith  
or see the bottom notes if you are lazy like me and want to be spoiled. :D

Rey jerked herself awake in bed. 

She was alone in a vast room with no windows. The obsidian walls were as dark as they were blank. It looked as if they were carved from a mountainside.

She was immediately aware of two things. 

First– this was a planet. There was no telltale scent of machine-filtered air; no discernable micromovements of a ship in motion. It was warm, very warm, and the heat seemed to leach inside through the walls. She doubted she was still on Pasana. 

The second thing Rey noticed was that she was naked. 

Not a strip of clothing, not even her bindings or armwraps, came between her and the crisp, charcoal sheets. She rubbed her temples– a headache always followed a force sleep, she noticed– and found her hair was down to her shoulders. She searched for the pins through her loose waves, but they were gone. He had taken them, too. 

Rey ground her teeth. She pulled the sheet with her as she sat up. Kylo Ren was a coward to knock her out rather than meet her head on. Rey hated that she succumbed so easily to a cheap trick. So focused on his attack, she had let her shields down. It wouldn’t happen again. 

The room didn’t look like a prison cell, at least none that she had seen. It was bare except for a small table in the corner with a small pile of clothes. Rey wrapped the sheet around her chest and stood. The smooth, stone floor was warm under her bare feet as she walked across the room.

The tidy, folded pile included a fitted tunic and leggings. All in black, of course. She lifted the top and a pair of small undershorts fell to the ground along with some type of bodice. She assumed it served the purpose of her bindings. Rey’s cheeks flushed hot when she realized Kylo had probably seen her underthings, and had most likely been the one to remove them from her himself. What else had he done while she was asleep? 

Fury rose thick in her throat. She would carve her name into his wide, pale chest next time instead of his face, just to show him she could.

Refusing to wear them from spite, Rey dropped the clothes to the floor in a messy pile. She knotted the sheet securely at her chest instead. She strode to the door and pressed her palms to the stone with closed eyes. She reached out in the force to detect any life forms nearby.

There was only one other being in the structure– _ him. _ Kylo moved, clearly sensing her intrusion, and she quickly moved away from him. Expanding her search outward, Rey frowned. It was too quiet, yet they couldn’t be the only ones here. She reached beyond the walls and into the sky as her uneasiness grew.

Still, so still. This was unnatural. No voices or cries, no movement of wings or feet, not even the small glimmer of a seed growing under the soil. The force on this planet was an empty void. The planet felt as dead as a tomb.

She focused her power and delved deep beneath her feet. All at once, her fingers began to vibrate with a new energy, both powerful and ancient. Whispers floated up and began to swirl in her ears as red flashed behind her eyelids like lighting. An ancient tongue repeated unknown words in a chant . . .

_ Klazje berniuk, zhol kash kam tu noret, zhol kash kam tu adata, atsvara ir midwan, visa nuo tu, tave plejada kash tu\'iea ar tu tik aukoti kash, accept jis, accept Kylo Ren vi tu\'iea meistras . . . _

His name. 

With a gasp, she broke off the connection and stepped back from the door. Fingers pulled into fists at her side as her heartbeat raced.

The door creaked open on its own.

Swallowing, Rey strode out of the room proud as a queen, with the tail of the sheet dragging behind her.

She found him in a large, central room staring out the window. His hands were clasped behind his wide back and his stance was even wider.

Poison pooled on her tongue. Rey inhaled, preparing either a tirade or a demand to fight, but her breath caught when she saw what he was looking at it.

It was a world on fire. A lake of lava, fed by smaller volcanic bodies, with sparks and shimmers of heat waves. Everything burned, and it oddly and conversely made her blood freeze in her veins.

“Where are we?” She asked.

“Mustafar,” Kylo said, and turned his head to the side when she didn’t respond. “Do you know of it?”

“No,” she said. Rey took another step forward to get a closer look, but stayed outside of his reach. She’d never touch him again.

“My grandfather built this castle during the Empire,” Kylo said and looked up, a touch of awe in his voice, “He would come here for meditation and restoration.”

She snorted. “That explains a lot.”

He turned around, dark eyes fixing on her face finally. “It has its charms. As you’ll discover for yourself.” 

His gaze dropped to the knot on the sheet. His tongue pressed out against his lower lip. “Did you not find the clothes to your taste?”

“I don’t want _ anything _ from you.”

“Can’t say that I mind your improvisation.”

He flicked two fingers and a breeze blew across the floor. Rey had to catch the sheet on her thighs to stop it from blowing open.

“You’re a bastard,” she said, as if the words themselves were bitter on her tongue.

Kylo smiled. “My mother denies it, but I have my suspicions.”

She jutted out her chin. “Where are my clothes?”

He shrugged. “Incinerated, with the other trash.”

“How _ dare _you.” Her blood boiled like the lava outside.

His smile was infuriating. “They were filthy. I beg your pardon, I didn’t know you’d find cleanliness so offensive.”

She almost growled at him, hands fisting tighter. “What did you do to me while I was asleep?”

His eyes sparkled with excitement. She realized he was enjoying himself. Rey wanted nothing more than to claw that look of amusement off his long, pale face with her fingernails.

“I cleaned you. Couldn’t you tell? Luckily I have a working fresher.”

“What did you do to me?!” She stepped closer, calling the force to her fingertips and preparing to strike.

Kylo closed the distance between them. He flashed white teeth, but it wasn’t exactly a smile. “Believe me, when I touch you, Scavenger, you will know it.” 

They stared at each other for a long moment, each waiting for the other to make the first move. She took a long breath and then walked past him to the window, crossing her arms.

“It won’t work holding me here. The Resistance has orders not to rescue me if I’m captured.”

“Oh, good. Then we won’t be disturbed. Not that they could find us, anyway.”

She turned sharply, voice full of venom. “Why didn’t you just kill me while you had the chance? Get it over with.”

His mocking humor vanished. His jaw tightened as his eyes darkened. “Why didn’t  _ you? _ When I was at your mercy on the floor?”

Rey turned away and didn’t answer, recalling the image of him unconscious on the throne room floor with ashes falling like rain. How could she put into words the very wrongness of taking his life that way? Not only because of her principles, but because it went against the will of the force that had bound them together? 

Rey could never admit aloud that she still carried the smallest sliver of hope that things could be different. That what she had seen in her vision– _ them standing side-by-side, belonging somewhere finally, a future that didn’t seem to contain fear–  _ was so tempting that she didn’t want to give up on it yet, not only for him but also for herself? 

How could she admit to the things that she knew she shouldn’t want?

“Answer me,” Kylo demanded.

“It wouldn’t have been right,” she said quietly, hoping he would accept that.

“Ah, your precious morality then.” The mockery had returned. “And not the misplaced sentiment of a naive girl.”

She set her jaw and refused to look at him, watching the red-orange plasma ooze over rock instead.

“Luckily I have no such constraints, Scavenger.” He stepped closer to speak just behind her ear, softly even as the words burned. “I could have laid you to rest in a bed of fire, but I didn’t. I chose to keep you.”

She closed her eyes. “Why?”

“Because I wanted to,” he said. “Now come to dinner.”

His heavy footsteps trailed away. Rey stared at the burning world until her eyes filled with tears.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The ancient Sith whispers:
> 
> "Listen child, it is what you want, it is what you need, balance and power, all for you. The galaxy is yours if you only give in, accept him, accept Kylo Ren as your master."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S.  
If you like a darker Canonverse Kylo, check out these great fics:
> 
> Belladonna by MalevolentReverie (or any of her canon work)  
Noli me Tangere and Oblivion by PoetHrotsvitha  
Chained by CaraRose  
Waiting for the Dark by Phainopepla
> 
> All seminal dark Kylo works!

Oh, but she was a stubborn little thing. 

Kylo stroked his upper lip to obscure a delighted smile as he stared across the long table. Rey sat with her hands tucked in her lap– prim as a princess, despite wearing only a bedsheet. Her eyes looked anywhere but at him. 

In the vast and empty room in an abandoned castle, it took quite an effort to avoid the only other living thing so persistently. 

It was _ delicious. _A rich feast of obstinance. Kylo licked his lips. After all, there was no satisfaction in an easy conquest.

The door to the kitchen swung open and a service droid rolled in carrying silverware and goblets of Corellian wine. The electronic sounds of wheels turning and metal clinking filled the silence between them. 

Had the Scavenger ever tasted fine wine? Kylo wondered idly if he would be able to share her pleasure through the bond, or if it was only the darker emotions– _ pain, fear, rage, loneliness– _ that bled through with such flavor. So much yet to discover. So much still to learn.

Since she refused to look at him, his eyes were free to roam over her.

Her hair was longer than he remembered. The first time he’d seen it down– that night by the fire, when she’d called to him, soaking wet and with a desperate ache– and it was burned into his memory. When he finally had the opportunity to touch it, he pulled out the buns to feel the loose strands between his fingers. 

Kylo threw out the pins so she couldn’t tie it up away from him again.

That was the only pleasure of touch he had allowed himself to take from her. Despite her accusation, he had not touched her body beyond what was necessary to divest her of the filthy rags she called clothes. He’d even kept his gloves on as he put her in the fresher. The smooth curves of her unconscious body were merely a tantalizing hint of what was to come to him. 

There was no joy in a conquest if she wasn’t awake to be vanquished. 

The droid returned carrying the plates of food. She was hungry– he could tell by the way her eyes flitted to the plates then away again. This close, she could scarcely hide anything from him, least of all her hunger.

Dinner was served, yet she made no move to touch it. Oddly polite for a desert rat.

“Please,” he said, inviting her to dine with a wave of his hand.

Her eyes finally fixed to his. A barely-veiled rage burned through her. Her hatred made such a pretty light, and he basked in it.

“What did you do to it?” she asked.

His tongue swiped across the front of his teeth. He picked up his fork. “Why would I poison you now?”

“To watch me suffer,” she replied.

“I can do that better with you alive.” He took a bite and chewed slowly, savoring both the taste and her anger.

“What do you want from me?”

_ Time– _but he wouldn’t tell her that. No answer would satisfy her anyway. He took a sip of wine instead. 

“You should try this, it’s an excellent vintage.”

“How long do you think you can keep me here?”

He shrugged. “You’re my guest.” 

She crossed her arms. “Word will get out.”

“I thought your friends wouldn’t come for you?” he said, volleying her prior words back at her. “Even if they did, they’d never find you behind the stealth shields. The planet looks like a lake of fire on any scans.”

The flicker of darkness across her face was very becoming, he thought. “I’ll find a way to escape,” she said. “Or I’ll kill you.”  
  


He smiled at that. “I don’t doubt you’ll try.” His anticipation rose as he watched for her reaction. “But there’s nowhere to go. There are no ships on the planet.”

Ah, there it was. A bit of surprise and fear, a touch of despondency, perhaps? Not complete hopelessness, she was far too stubborn for that. That would come later.

The color drained from her face in almost equal measure to the stretch of his smile.

“There are no weapons, except for practice staffs and whatever tools are in the kitchen. No other living creatures to manipulate with the force, just the two basic droids with defense protocols so you can’t destroy them for parts. No communications or advanced technology beyond an ancient bacta tank.”

He looked around the room in appreciation as his hand waved vaguely. “The castle is empty and isolated, like an island in a sea of fire. My knights will return in a few weeks to drop off provisions. Until then–”

His eyes returned to her and he was rewarded with the most lovely venomous glare. “It’s just us.”

“You’re _ a monster. _”

“So I’ve been told.” He sliced through another piece of meat, making a show of nonchalance as he looked down at his plate. “You may as well eat before it gets cold.”

Her chair scraped back and there was the slightest sound of movement through the air. It was sudden but not unexpected. Kylo raised his hand without looking to freeze her knife a few feet from his face. It hovered between them.

He drew it to his palm and placed it down on the table. Rey stood panting with clenched fists, glowering at him. The force energy crackled between them, electric and disturbed, bouncing between their two poles of light and dark. Unstable, yet balanced. Matched in strength.

They were equals in a stalemate.

“Please.” He slid the knife back to her across the smooth, black table. “Eat.”

Rey set her jaw and after a few moments sat down again. She blinked. Finally she picked up her fork.

They ate in silence.

+++

Since the entire castle was a prison, there was no need to contain her. He retired to his own suite and left the angry Scavenger to her own devices.

Kylo got into bed and stared at the ceiling. For months, while Rey had been blocking him from the bond, he had been honing a new skill in secret. He had perfected the technique with the knowledge from ancient Sith manuscripts. Now he could cloak himself in shadows to reach out in the force and observe her undetected. Even a powerful force wielder like her would not know he was there. 

Rey roamed the castle halls like a caged lothcat as he tracked her. She tested corners and walls for any weaknesses. He knew she wouldn’t find any. After several hours, she finally wore herself out and returned to her room.

Kylo smiled as he crossed his arms on his chest, closing his eyes. It was all working out so perfectly. He felt the moment the last gasp of her consciousness crossed over into her dreams. Then he began. 

He sent out thin tethers through the force. Tiny filaments of connection that allowed him access to her mind. Not enough to wake or disturb, certainly not enough to change her dreams or influence her. Just enough to watch.

For now.

  
  



	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is Kylo up to? Hmm. Let's just say he didn't choose Mustafar for the view.

The pounding in her head woke her– as loud as a fist on the door.

The dream slipped away like a shadow in the midday sun. _ There had been heat. A familiar place like Jakku, or maybe Pasana? Darkness. An enemy . . . _ The details were gone now. All that remained was a vague sense of unease. 

Even after a full night’s sleep, Rey did not feel rested. Rubbing her temples, she sat up in bed as loose hair fell over her eyes. Anger flashed hot in her veins– she _ hated _ that. If you couldn’t see, you couldn’t fight. Annoyed, she tucked it back behind her ears and looked around the room.

It was the same as yesterday. The black clothes were neatly folded and stacked on the table again. By a droid, or by him? Either way, her mood soured at the invasion of her space. It sunk even further with the realization she thought of it as_ her room _now. 

Rey was nothing if not a pragmatist. Denial didn’t keep you alive in the desert. Her whole life, she had scraped together an existence from whatever pieces she had found. The first step was clear-eyed acceptance of the truth: Kylo had caught her. She was trapped. She believed him when he said there was no transport off the planet. Although her skin itched to admit it, he had the upper hand. 

Although she could accept she was trapped, she found it difficult to believe that he wouldn’t have a way to communicate. Some kind of lifeline to his forces. It didn’t seem his nature to entirely cut himself off. Kylo could be hiding it from her.

If a lifeline existed, Rey would find it. She was very good at finding things and had nothing but time.

Throwing back the covers, she walked to the fresher. It was like nothing she had seen before. Antiquated with strange faucets and a large container in the corner that surely couldn’t be for holding water. It would be far too much, wasteful. She inspected it with bald curiosity about the mechanics. With a twist of her wrist, real water sputtered and then poured out into the large basin. Her eyes opened wide. What a lewd luxury, to have a whole pool of water on a planet of heat. She turned it off quickly.

To her amazement, the shower also rained down pure, filtered water. She’d never experienced such extravagance. What other surprises did the castle hold? Eyes closed, Rey threw her head back and drank the water down as she rinsed her hair. Her mouth snapped shut when she noticed she was smiling.

There were no other options for clothes besides the bed sheet, which held its own obvious disadvantages. She grit her teeth and dressed quickly to not dwell on his petty victory. She’d get hers soon.

Rey had survived for years before hearing the name Kylo Ren, and she’d live for many more long after he was forgotten. That’s what she told herself as she threw open the doors to go look for breakfast.

+++

Kylo wasn’t there, thankfully. Breakfast was set out on her end of the table. Once she pulled in the chair, the droid rolled out with hot caf. She ate in silence and found it tolerable. The food was good and there was plenty of it.

She tried not to think of her friends. She’d told Finn, Poe and Chewie it was too dangerous for them to follow once she felt Kylo’s presence on the surface. She drew him away to give the Resistance time to escape. They would worry– and for that, she felt the most guilt. It was a pain in her chest she couldn’t rub away.

When she was done eating, Rey re-started her investigation of the main floor. Most doors didn’t even contain locks and led to empty rooms, but she found one door at the end of a long hall that was barred shut. Even using the force on the lock mechanism wouldn’t budge it. Interesting. You only lock things of value.

The sound of clattering nearby caught her attention. Rey followed it around the corner. A set of double doors was open and she peeked around the door frame.

Kylo was training with a wooden staff. He practiced drills against a mannequin. She stood watching him silently for a moment. It was a rare opportunity to see his movements unnoticed.

He was an absolute beast of a man. Tall, wide, powerful even without the force. He had stripped down to a fitted black tank and pants with suspenders, his arm guards and tunic discarded. He spun and on the downstroke the wooden staff cracked against the solid torso of the dummy. The floor shook with reverberations. He turned over his other shoulder and elbowed the neck before twisting behind it to land a one-two hit on the abdomen that would send any creature to the medic, if not the mortuary.

The pale bands of muscle in his arms strained. Her own heart beat faster to match his. The effect of the bond was heightened by close proximity. Rey took deep, slow breaths to wrestle her own pulse down again.

Kylo sensed her and straightened. With a toss of his head, he cleared his eyes and turned.

“Good morning,” he said, his voice deep and smooth.

“Is it?” she replied curtly, crossing her arms.

“Every morning you wake up breathing is a good morning,” he said simply and smirked. 

His good humor and calm had a disproportionate and opposite effect on her. Rey clenched her jaw in response, oozing hatred in his direction.

“Rough night, was it?” Kylo called another staff to his hand with the force. “Let’s put that bad mood to use.” He tossed it at her, and she caught it. “Spar.”

“You can’t be serious,” she said.

“What else is there to do? You’ve searched every inch of the castle already.” His eyes poured down her body. “And you don’t want to lose your muscle.”

She sneered at him. “You brought me here to train with you? Wouldn’t anyone else play with the Supreme Leader? _ ”  _ She narrowed her eyes in mockery.

Kylo seemed unaffected by her venom. If anything, his smile only widened with his stance. He twisted the staff between his huge hands. “You’re the only one I want to play with, Scavenger. Begin.”

She wanted to wipe that infernal grin off his face. Kylo was a brawler, used to two-handed weapons, not a staff fighter. She should have the advantage. It would feel nice to hit him a little.

With a snarl, she lunged– swinging the top end of the staff for his shoulder. She’d expected him to block her easily– which he did– so she used the rebound energy to slap his thigh with the other end. Hard.

Kylo grunted and took a step back with a grimace. He circled around her and his smile returned.

“So angry. So very angry for a Jedi.”

“I’m no Jedi. You of all people should know that, Jedi killer.”

A flicker of annoyance crossed his features, but the smug mask returned. “Good. It was a failed ideology that collapsed under its own weight.”

“Then why did you want to destroy them if they weren’t a threat?”

She struck again before he could respond. A quick barrage of jabs that landed a solid blow to his ribs, despite him blocking her more serious strikes. You needed balance for staff work, and speed. Rey had both on her side.

They circled each other like two lothcats, ready to spit and scratch. The force energy rose and swirled around them with dark stripes of anger. There were other emotions twisted together that she couldn’t tease apart.  _ Fear, perhaps. Envy. _

“The rot came from within the order. Failure was inevitable.”

“That’s not what you believed when you trained with Luke. Before you gave in to your own weaknesses.”

_ Frustration. _

A small muscle under his eye pulsed. She had offended him, and Rey took very un-Jedi pleasure in that. His defensive posture changed and Kylo lunged forward in an attack. 

She blocked the powerful swing, but her arms shook from the effort. He struck again, using broad, heavy blows to keep her straining and backing away. Their staffs crossed and he pushed her back a step as she stood her ground against him.

“Using the dark inside of you is strength, not weakness. You of all people feel that power. Don’t deny it, just give in.”

_ Desire.  _ She closed her eyes briefly, trying to shut down the bond before she could sense any more. It was nearly impossible with him so close.  _ Resist. _

“Never.” Rey snarled as her arms shook with the effort of matching strength for strength.

Kylo was close enough that she felt his hot breath on her cheek. His voice lowered to a near whisper. _ _ “You’re right– you’re no Jedi. Denying who you really are weakens you. Let me show you.” His eyes dropped to her lips.  _ Lust. _

_ Resist.  _ All she had left was that thought. She gritted her teeth and pushed the thought back at him through the bond like a cry. 

“I’ll _ never _ be like you.” 

Rey kicked his calf and twisted away as he staggered back. With a growl, she attacked again in a flurry of small blows. He may have power, but she had speed, and she hit the outside of his shoulder, his back and his knee before he could block.

His knee gave out and he landed on the floor. She came before him and swung wide for his jaw, but he caught her staff and held firm.

“You’re already like me,” he panted. “That wasn’t the light fueling you.”

Rey froze. Her mask of fury relaxed to neutral as her eyes widened. He was right, she had felt the swell of darkness rise. He took advantage of the moment and yanked her staff toward him. Rey stumbled forward, hand catching on his shoulder before she fell.

On his knees, he looked up at her with eyebrows raised. “You felt it. Just give in.” 

He had no right to look at her like that. His dark eyes and voice were too soft. He was her enemy, and she hated him. She hated him with every fiber of her being, how dare he make her feel that way.

She struggled away from him and dropped the staff to the floor with a clatter.

“Never.”

She spun and walked away from him, leaving him there on his knees. It wasn’t until she left the room and his sight that she balled her fists to stop the shaking.

  
  
  



	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're going to start earning the tags next chapter.  
Please check updated tags each chapter to tags decide if this content is right for you!
> 
> I'm no expert on Sith lore, so I'm treating it sort of like magic. Check out the Sith priestess in the moodboard- she's one wicked dark mother!  
Sith translations in bottom notes.
> 
> +++
> 
> You have to read the amazing one-shot that DangerTaylor wrote in this universe! It’s so hot and perfect for them! Look under the related works or my gifts for “Struggle.” Thank you so much, friend!  
https://archiveofourown.org/works/21486580

Kylo remained on his knees as the sound of her footsteps faded into silence and the only heart he felt beating in his chest was his own. The leather of his gloves cracked as his fists pressed into his thighs. Knuckles ground down to the point of pain.

_ Stupid. _

_ Stupid and weak. _

They were old words, dead words, but they spoke to him in his own voice now. He allowed his guard to fall down again with her. The need leaked out of him like water from a cracked vessel.

Asking her, like a fool. _A pathetic child begging for scraps. _

He was the Supreme Leader of the First Order, and he would never ask again. He would just take.

Kylo lumbered up to standing like a wounded bull. His blood roared in his ears. It had been a long time, but he felt the old companion of rage surge to life. It was a comfort, a well-worn path home. Rage he knew, rage was always there for him when he needed it.

If only he had his saber. The sizzle of his plasma blade cutting a path of destruction was the best release. He'd make do with what he had. Kylo wheeled over his shoulder and began raining down destruction on the mannequin with his staff. Heaving, unblocked blows ricocheted off the solid wood and made his bones rattle. He struck the figure, over and over, until the staff splintered into shards at his feet and the figure broke into three pieces.

Panting, he shook his hair from his eyes. The searing ache in his muscles was a welcome relief from the screaming of his mind. He could focus the pain on a place he could touch, a place he could control. If he wore his pain, it wouldn’t haunt him at night.

Kylo dropped the ruined pieces and stopped at the doorway to send out his senses. Rey was in her room, on the bed, lying down but not asleep. 

He turned the opposite direction and walked down the hall in heavy strides until he came before the locked door. A panel was hidden in the stone. Kylo stripped off the glove on his left hand to place his imprint in the center. With a flash of red, the door unlocked. He stepped into darkness and the door closed behind him with a clash. 

The winding stairs down were slick with the humidity. The castle recycled water from the condensation of steam in the caverns underneath. It was a never-ending source of fresh water on an island of fire. The humidity levels rose the lower Kylo descended into the caverns and sweat beaded on his brow from the increased heat. He followed the well-worn path down deeper until the smooth walls of the castle gave way to rough rock and indigenuous stone. He lit a torch with a bit of force lightning, a handy trick for a Sith, and came to another heavy door with a large, gold ring that he pushed open slowly.

Kylo entered the Sith temple reverently. Setting the torch in a holder by the altar, he kneeled down before it. His hands and forehead rested on the smooth, polished stone. He began to chant.

_ Motina iv saud, motina iv midwan. Aukoti nun anas which nu iezkon ir adata. Tarnas nun conquer ir vykti kam kash manosi. Dotacij nun tave ty kia vanquish nuyak laikas. Liepti nun tu\'iea secrets iv midwan. _

Over and over, Kylo repeated the incantation, drawing concentrated power from the Sith nexus. The dark power swirled and surged around him as it throbbed to life, magnifying this close to the core of the planet. His prayer drew power from the fire, from his own pain, and from the screams that were imbedded in the castle walls itself.

Suddenly there was a loud hiss. He lifted his head. Standing before him was an apparition, a Sith priestess. A woman, or what was once a woman long ago, with grey, wrinkled skin and amber, blood-shot eyes. Her ornate headdress and piercings dangled across her face surrounding a mask that covered her mouth and nose. Her robes were long and black, and when he looked too closely at the edges, they shimmered and faded into transparency.

“Boy, what do you wish from me?” she whispered. Her voice was modulated by the mask, both deep and hoarse, yet it still seemed to slice through him.

“I am no boy. I rule the galaxy,” Kylo answered, lifting his chin.

The figure laughed. “I knew another boy who ruled, too. You are much like him.”

“I called you awake, Dark Mother. Grant me what I seek.”

Her head cocked at an odd angle like a bird to regard him with her strange eyes. “And what is it that you want?”

Kylo licked his lips. “Power. Control.”

She shook her head slowly, eyes crinkling as if she were smiling under the mask. “Tell me what you really seek.”

He worked his jaw in annoyance. “Obedience. Servitude.” 

She did not answer him and the weight of the silence felt like an accusation. He stood and flexed his hands as the truth tumbled out. 

“Her.”

“Ah, yes. Yes, I see. That I can grant you, but what are you willing to give up?”

“A sacrifice?”

“An exchange,” she corrected. Her gaze turned piercing with her excitement.

“For the girl? To have her accept my dominance?” Kylo set his jaw. “Anything. I value nothing else as highly.”

The apparition surged forward, choppy, as if he had blinked and she had moved without him seeing. Her amber eyes burned bright and eager. “Would you give up your remaining light? All of it?”

He didn’t think twice. “Yes.”

Her voice turned cloying. “What about . . . hers? Would you exchange her light, too?”

Kylo flinched, but contained his expression. “It wouldn’t be possible. She’s too strong in the light.”

“Strong in the light is often strong in the dark, too. It just takes a–” the priestess reached a long spindle of a finger to tap his nose, “_push _ to change the balance. So would you trade her light, as well?”

He worked his jaw. “You could do that without hurting her?”

She laughed. “I didn’t say it wouldn’t hurt her. But she will survive and be far more pliable to your will. Either as apprentice, or–” she winked at him, "lover.”

He felt heat on his cheeks, the anger at her mockery flashing hot on his skin. Yet that was what he was asking, wasn’t it? To have her fully, however he wished? He could feel no shame in admitting it, not here. If he wished to own her completely, that came with a price.

Kylo wondered what Rey would be without her light. Would she be as lovely, as tempting? If he took it from her, what would be left behind? 

The sharp tang of the memory touched his lips, of her stalking him in a snowy forest as he lay on his back beneath her, broken and bleeding. The fierce look of bloodlust in her eyes, her bared teeth and heaving chest.

Oh, yes, he wanted her. Whatever was left behind after the light was stripped free of her like a curse, he wanted it. Perhaps even more.

“If you can take it from her, it’s yours.”

The priestess bobbed happily. He didn’t have to see her face to know she was smiling. “Then let us begin.”

She curled a finger to bring him closer and he knelt down. She placed her hands on his shoulders, and he felt a sharp sting. He could not tell if her touch was very hot or very cold.

The priestess began whispering in his ear. Kylo’s eyes rolled back in his head and the words were echoed silently on his lips.

_ Klazje berniuk, zhol kash kam tu noret, zhol kash kam tu adata, atsvara ir midwan, visa nuo tu, tave plejada kash tu\'iea ar tu tik aukoti kash, accept jis, accept Kylo Ren vi tu\'iea meistras . . . _

Everything went black.

+++

When he awoke, the torch had burned down to a stub. He groaned and rolled over on his side, rubbing at his eyes. They stung.

He dragged himself back to his room. He had missed a meal, perhaps two. Rey was most likely relieved to be unburdened by his presence. The thought made him seethe.

Kylo knocked open the fresher door and stumbled inside, frustrated and groggy. As he turned the handle to the shower, he passed the mirror and froze at his reflection.

His eyes. Where there had been warm cocoa were now shades of dark gold. The draining of his light was marked by ochre and crimson. Kylo blinked at himself for a moment, and then turned back to the streaming water with a smile as he undressed.

That meant it was working.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo's first Sith prayer to summon her:
> 
> Mother of fire, mother of power. Give me that which I seek and need. Help me conquer and take what is mine. Grant me the strength to vanquish my enemy. Tell me your secrets of power.
> 
> What he repeats with the priestess (learning the spell):
> 
> Listen child, it is what you want, it is what you need, balance and power, all for you, the galaxy is yours if you only give in, accept him, accept Kylo Ren as your master.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, let the fun and games begin.
> 
> Kylo, you sneaky dog. ;)

It was dark. 

Not cool, but cooler than outside on the open sands. The midday sun on Jakku was a punishment. Even the stale, dead air of the wreckage was a relief.

Rey adjusted the pin light next to her goggles and dangled like a spider on a web. One more electrical panel, and she could head to Plutt’s and collect her portions. Just one more. The only sound in the cavernous space was her own breath and the sound of metal scraping metal. She pried it loose finally and shoved it into her pack, then slid back down to the ground.

Pack strapped on the side of her speeder, she lifted her goggles to take a sip of water. Her eyes roamed the dunes. 

There was a flash. She squinted to make it out. 

A figure stood in the distance. Tall, black as a shadow, with a smooth, black helmet that caught and splintered the light. A cape billowed back in the wind as it watched her. 

She watched it back.

When it made no move in her direction, she climbed aboard the speeder and headed to Plutt’s. She checked over her shoulder once, but the figure didn’t follow.

+++

That night, Rey built a small fire in the pit next to her shelter. She was restless, lonely, and being outside helped on those nights. She wrapped herself in a blanket and stared up at the wide swath of stars. She licked the last of her portion clean from the foil packet and dropped it on the sand.

She was used to being alone. Sometimes she didn’t hear another living voice for days. The silence grew so thick in her ears that she had to talk to herself to quiet it. It made no sense to her that she heard the absence of something so loudly. She supposed that missing something was its own form of pain, just like the heavy ache in her chest every morning when she added another hash mark to her wall.

A rock scattered behind her and she jerked up. A tall shape emerged as if it was cut from the night itself. Draped in black robes, the flickering flames reflected off the helmet. She recognized the same creature from the dunes.

Rey scrambled to reach for her staff as her pulse raced. The figure lifted gloved hands to show her they were empty.

“I’m not here to hurt you,” he said in a voice modulated by the mask. Deep as a nightmare.

“Get away!” Rey cried, “Or I’ll hurt_ you. _”

“That’s not very hospitable,” he replied sardonically. “I would take my time to earn your trust, but since this is only a memory, I haven’t the patience.” He waved a hand and the staff flew from her hands and landed yards away, clattering against her shelter.

Rey took a step back preparing to bolt, eyes wide. He flicked his wrist again and she froze in place. Her muscles no longer responded. Fear surged and she panted as he closed in on her, like a rabbit caught in a snare.

“Don’t be afraid. I only want to know you, Rey. That is all.” He loomed over her. Rey stared at the mask, but all she saw were her own wild eyes reflected back. A gloved hand rose to her face and hovered just outside of her cheek. 

“I want to know what it was like for you here. What it felt like to be so alone.”

Her voice cracked. “Why should you care?”

“Where there is pain, there are cracks. Places to be filled.”

Tears welled up in her eyes. She shut them as a presence draped over her like a cloud. It was everywhere at once– in her lungs, her heart, her mind, her limbs. It rifled through her, suffocating, clinging and searching. She winced at the pain of ancient scabs being ripped open, of long-suppressed aches and sorrows once again flooding her. He took what he wanted.

“What I felt from you before was just a taste. You have an ocean of pain to explore.” His voice was full of awe.

A hot tear raced down her cheek.

“They left you here, like garbage. Like scrap. So young.”

“Stop!” It felt like he was choking her, but she realized it was her own sobs. “Stop it!”

“You needed them. Anyone. But it was just you.”

“_Please, _ please stop!”

The hand that was hovering over her cheek landed on her skin. She flinched, anticipating pain, but his touch was gentle. His leather glove was warm and soft as he wiped away a tear with his thumb.

“Not anymore. You won’t be alone anymore.”

Her lower lip quivered.

He let go to unlatch his mask. With a release of pressure, he removed it and faced her again.

It was no monster, but a man. Much younger than she expected, and striking. Handsome, with dark eyes ringed with gold. They were strange and beautiful eyes, and they bored into hers. 

Rey was mesmerized. “Who are you?” Rey asked in a whisper.

“Your fate.”

It was like a dream. He removed a glove and cupped her face again, bare handed. He was tender as a thumb traced her lip. He stepped even closer to speak softly. “You don’t have to be afraid anymore, my love. I’m here.”

His other hand wrapped around her waist and drew her to his chest. It was like a fairytale, the dark prince finally here to rescue her from a tower. She stared up at him in confusion, the brightness of the stars making her blink. 

“Who are you?” she asked again.

He cupped her cheek again, whispering to her lips. “Your future. I’ll never leave you.”

His lips touched hers with a flood of heat. She’d never been kissed by anyone, had drawn blood from others who had tried. But his full, soft lips felt familiar. Strange and scary, yet soothing. The comfort was overwhelming. Rey was lost in it and sank into his arms. 

She felt herself swoon and he lifted her and carried her inside. She curled into his chest and allowed herself to be held. It was terrifying, how much she wanted this, someone to rescue her. He placed her gently down on her pallet and leaned on elbows above her.

A tingling sensation returned to her fingers when he unbound her arms, but instead of pushing him away her trembling hands held his shoulders. He kissed her, slowly and thoroughly, taking care and time to explore her mouth. He broke from her lips to trail kisses down her jaw. He nipped at her throat, and she gasped. 

It was the gasp that woke her.

+++

Rey shot up in bed.

Her body still held residual heat, as if the dream were real. She realized with shame she was aroused. Her heart still raced with the feel of his body pressing into hers, his soft lips brushing her skin. The pleasure receded like smoke in the wind, replaced with the humiliation of awareness.

It was just a dream. He had invaded her dreams somehow, and she didn’t think that was an accident.

Rey threw back the covers and stood quickly. She flung open her door and didn’t bother dressing, walking out to find him in her black, satin nightdress.

Kylo was sitting at the end of the table before his full breakfast plate, fingers tented and the ghost of a smile haunting his lips.

The same full lips that had . . .

“You,” she spit at him.

“Trouble sleeping?” He asked. “Did you have fitful dreams?”

“It won’t work. I don’t know what you think you’re doing, but it won’t work on me.”

“Oh?” he smiled at her like a snake that had swallowed an egg. “What is it you think I’m doing to you?”

She crossed her arms and jut out her chin fiercely. What was he trying to do? Tempt her? Tease her? She didn’t like speaking either option.

“Stay out of my head,” Rey finally said.

“Hmm. Did you dream about me, Jedi? Is that it?” She wanted to slap the sly sparkle out of his eyes.

“It’s not real. Dreams are not real.”

“Is that so?” He slowly stood and took a step closer. "They don’t frighten you?”

“No,” she said, too quickly. She felt a spike fear throbbing through her veins. She wasn’t even sure if it was of him. “Dreams can’t hurt me.”

The words were a mistake. She knew it the moment she felt his excitement bleed through their bond and his heartbeat quickening.

“Ah, I see. So anything can happen.”

It felt like a dare. His eyes grazed down her body, still clad in only her thin nightgown. It was no protection from him at all. Rey turned so she didn’t have to see the hunger on his face.

She sat in her place at the table and threw her hair over a shoulder in false confidence. Taking an aggressive bite of the pastry on her plate, she didn’t wait to swallow before saying, “Keep out of my head.”

He sat down again and sipped his caff. For the first time, she noticed the new ring of gold around his eyes and how it shone in the light.

+++

There was only so much avoidance one can do of the only other living thing in the castle.

She covered every square inch several times, it seemed. Rey knew the capabilities of the two service droids (very limited, no communication apparatus) and the weaknesses in the walls (only enough to let her slip out into molten lava, so not helpful at all).

Kylo’s chambers were still a mystery, and she wanted to keep it that way.

That only place left to explore was the mysterious door that led under the castle. It remained locked by some force magic that she couldn’t persuade open. Rey assumed that meant something of great value lay underneath, perhaps his emergency communications or even a transport, so it was only a matter of time before she figured out a way to open it. 

Rey could be patient if she needed to be.

She spent her time reading old, arcane texts he left on the table in her room. At first she rejected them, threw them against the wall, but after days of boredom she sought any stimulation she could find as a means of ignoring him. She cared less about his evident pleasure when he caught her reading the books than the momentary relief from the tedium.

And they trained. Bodies and muscle, reverting to instincts and power. 

They trained in silence punctuated by sharp and reluctant grunts. Sometimes he uttered compliments, such as mutterings of “good,” or “yes, that’s it.”

His encouragement infuriated her. Partly for his arrogance in presuming to give her praise, but also from her secret joy at receiving it. Truth be told, Rey had always sought a mentor and yet never had one. She was a quick study the hard way, teaching herself through bruises and electric shocks. To have someone willing to teach her was a new experience. The fact that it was her enemy who showed more interest in her than anyone else in her life was a bitter pill indeed.

That afternoon, Rey flipped her staff over her shoulder to hit him off balance and then tripped him. As Kylo fell on his back, the mass of his large body working against him for once, she landed on his chest and held the staff to his throat, pinning him down solidly.

They panted, staring each other down, him beneath her as their heartbeats pumped in time.

“Well done,” he said, voice rough. She pressed the staff to his throat in warning.

“Shut up,” she said. Her lips curled away from her teeth, but she wouldn’t call it a smile.

“I’m at your mercy, Jedi,” he said. “What will you do to me?”

“Stop calling me that,” Rey gritted out. “I’m no Jedi.”

Her hands were occupied with the staff and holding him down, but his were free to roam. They crept up and landed on her thighs. He squeezed gently, his wide palms digging in, and she pushed down on his windpipe in response.

“No, you aren’t, are you?” he said, hoarsely. The gold in his eyes shimmered. It made her heart skip erratically. A subsumed feeling crept up from her subconscious.

Fondness. She tried to suppress it, but the feel of his lips on hers was so fresh in her mind. He had infected her memory. The gentle way he looked at her in the dream blended with the hazy recollection. His promises were still ringing in her ears.

_You’ll never be alone again. _

_I am your fate. _

_Your future._

Rey gasped and snapped back, pulling the staff with her. She scrambled up to standing and turned away. A pulse of heat throbbed in her chest. A crack in her heart, formed when she was small, started to fill with something soft. _Hope._ He had filled that aching pit of loneliness with something like hope.

Lies, it was all lies. Rey shook her head and dropped her staff to the floor with a clatter. “That’s enough for today,” she said without turning. She marched straight back to her room without turning back.

As she stepped under the hot spray of water in the fresher, her fingers couldn’t help but slide down and discover just how wet his false promises had made her. Her body was worked up, adrenaline pumping, and she stroked herself up to climax under the spray, biting her lip to hide her moans. Thinking of a false memory of a dark prince in the desert who’d come to rescue her.

As she came down alone with water pouring down her face, she closed her eyes and wished the feelings away.

For the first time since she’d arrived, Rey was truly afraid.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from the lyrics of "New Constellations" by Ryn Weaver:
> 
> So keep calling me crazy 'cause I never learned  
You should stop loving fire because you got burned  
Now it feels like I'm living some sick déjà vu  
Like the answers were there when I stared into you
> 
> \------------------------------------------
> 
> Star Wars characters are property of The Walt Disney Company.  
Original story and characters are copyright © 2019 by NewerConstellations. All rights reserved.
> 
> This work is intended for personal use by Ao3 users while posted. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without prior written permission of author, except in the cases of certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. Please do not transmit downloads beyond personal use.
> 
> For permission requests, write to newerconstellations@gmail.com.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Struggle](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21486580) by [DangerTaylor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DangerTaylor/pseuds/DangerTaylor)


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